Nicole....and journeys

In order to be able and willing to do something of this magnitude, I'd really need to know who I am, what I want out of life, and what to do to make myself happy. But how am I to know this when it sometimes becomes so hard to be detached from the outside world and from people's various influences. You sometimes feel like you have to look at everyone elses advice and compare them to your own desires and needs. If they don't match, it then becomes so easy to beleive that you're in the wrong and not those people who see you with what's easily imagined to be a more objective eye. But if you've let other influences shape and mould you for so long, how can they know what's in your own heart? Their view really becomes less objective and more a product of what they see in the vision that they have made of you, and thus really not you at all. If I want something bad enough, I guess I'll just have to trust that it will feel right and that somewhere within myself I will be able to find the courage to go on even if it's by myself.